i still remember when i was growin up in san jose, how i wanted to just leave because i thought there was nothing there. but san jose recently has become my place of refuge to get away from the pressure cooker of berkeley. when my ears taste the familiar sound of my friend's voices, things just get better.
it's raining again in berkeley. i feel like the weather is characterizing what is going on inside me. there's a constant battle between the sun (happiness) and rain (depression). i really want the sun to win because that means i don't feel as depressed, but we need the rain though because california is in a drought.
emotions are meant to be felt though. but for some emotions, i don't want to hold their hand so much anymore. i'd like them to not rely on me so much. but then again, a good question, is why are they relying on me? if i am my emotion's counselor's, why do they come and visit me then? they need specific needs to be met, but i'm not sure how to meet them still.
writing letters has been helpful, but i'm not sure if it's enough.