I went to a friend from high school's college graduation party.
note we're both 21/22 years old.
it's funny cause I walked in with a bottle of tequila and almost every person I met greeted me with a smile.
even my old cross country coach that I hadn't seen in like 2 years.
it was great to catch up and see how he's doing and as well the school.
i forgot how much I loved running and cross country.
that's how I met most of my friends in high school.
most of us haven't changed.
some are graduating next week.
one is going to grad school in Georgia.
i have my own place and a job and I'm just chilling right now.
it's strange how 8 years have gone by and yet I'm still connected with my high school and these friends.
i took my shot with my friend.
just one, but to be able to have a drink with a friend who I grew up with and have gone through a heartbreak with meant a lot to me.
im at my aunt's house right now.
i think we're going to finally get internet on Tuesday. But we'll see.
its nice to sit and laugh with my aunt, uncle and Pops.
as usual or for the ump-teenth time, my aunt has asked if I have a partner.
I had one.
we were never official.
yet I've been heartbroken this whole year too recently when I started to get some closure.
im glad that I didn't get the job in DC.
i think a spirit out there wants to keep me here.
as well, I think being with people will be good for me because I've been so lonely for a while.
but lonely and loneliness are different.
lonely to me mans absence of people.
loneliness means being surrounded by people but not feeling understood or actually supported.
i feel both a lot. Especially in the summer time.
usually I'm alone. Most of my birthdays are celebrated alone.
usually no friends come over and I just sit. Even though birthday's shouldn't be such a big deal.
i mean who wants to get older after 21, right?
no I'm just kidding to an extent about that.
anywho birthdays shouldn't be made such a big deal, but it's nice to have people focus some attention on you every year.
i hope this summer is a lot better.
it's starting off pretty well and I haven't lost my cool, but I'm still suspicious~